Do you remember those times in school when you knew you were going to get in trouble for something? Be it something you did and you knew the teacher was going to talk to you, or you did something and someone was going to find out.
Those moments when the teacher knows you did something and says "Simon, I want to see you after class" or something similar are the worst! You sit there the rest of the day with nothing else on your mind except that, you worry about the impending doom that is coming your way at the end of the day or whenever you're going to talk to your teacher.
I thought those days were long gone where you'd sit at your desk with that feeling in your stomach and just watching the clock tick away. You think of what you're going to tell them but even though you have your "excuses" or your "story" it makes no difference, the anticipation of getting in trouble is still there. It's even not limited to school, it's for when you're at home too and you know that you're in trouble when your parents get home from work. So it's 3pm and you're home from school, the teacher or principal has already called your parents. Now you wait till 6 or 6:30 until they get home ... those 3 hours are horrible! You can try to keep your mind busy but it's never going to work.
So now I'm 29 and I'm in that situation again. I have to talk to my boss about something I did here at work and I'm still waiting another 45 minutes to talk to him. I found out at noon about this and it's been eating at me the whole day.
No matter what the issue is in school, family or work, it could the smallest thing, but it's just that waiting to get yelled at or waiting to get in trouble is the worst part - it's sometimes even worse than the actual "punishment."
I sit here waiting for what lies ahead ... should I start packing my things in that all too familiar cardboard box that we see when someone leaves their job? The anticipation is killing me!
+ mon